Dorothy Ruth (Hawkeswood) Carlin was born on Sunday, April 18th, 1920, early in the morning, at home, in Windsor, Ontario, Canada. She was named “Dorothy” because her dad liked the name (he always teased his wife that Ruth was named after one of his old girlfriends), and also it was the name of one of my Ruth’s mother’s sisters. Her dad was a Sunday School Teacher at the Temple Baptist Church in Windsor for 25 years, and the lesson on that Sunday was the story of “Ruth and Naomi” –so her parents decided to name her “Ruth”, which is what she has always been known by.
Ruth’s parents, Edwin and Margaret Hawkeswood had immigrated to Canada from England, and she grew up in a proper British home with her older brother’s Ted and Vic and her younger sister Barb. Her father opened an automotive repair shop in Detroit, Michigan before moving his shop to Windsor in 1930. He was a woodworker and built beautiful furniture. This skill also allowed him to do body work on wrecked cars. He would buy luxury cars that had been wrecked and fix them, then the family would drive them until he sold them.
She loved those cars, and especially the convertibles. She remembered specifically a Pierce Arrow, LaSalle, Auburn, Packard, and a Nash touring car, and to quote Ruth, “when the top was down, we thought we were pretty sporty.” She wondered if people thought they were snobs riding in these big cars, but enjoyed it for as long as it lasted. Her love of beautiful cars lasted her entire life. Many people came to take her for a ride over the years. And those rides were fast because she was not a girl that drove slow.
When her dad was still working in Detroit, on some Fridays, her mom would take her and Barb over to meet her dad as he was finishing up work. He would take them to eat at the White Castle for a hamburger, she remembered that they cost about 5 cents. Sometimes they would go to a show, but, mostly, they stopped at the place where they made the Vernors ginger ale, that they loved so much.
She remember one time that they were visiting her dad in Detroit and he had fixed up this “super looking” Auburn sports car, and they were going home to Windsor in it. The only problem was – only three people could fit in it, and there were four of them. Her dad decided that she should get in the trunk, which she did. It didn’t bother her because she could still talk to them, but she worried that when they had to go through Customs, the Inspector would open the trunk to check for cigarettes, and “booze”, which they did at random, but, luckily, they didn’t bother this time.
She breathed a sigh of relief, but never forgot that experience, or that beautiful car they didn’t keep as long as she had hoped.
At the age of six, Ruth started school at the Prince of Wales School. At the end of the year, she was presented with a china cup and saucer for standing first in the class all year. In 5th Grade her sister, Barbara, caught up to her, skipping 4th Grade. Barb was very brilliant and always got the top grades in the class. Grandma did really well in school until 5th Grade, and then began to slip back, and developed an inferiority complex. By the time she was in 8th Grade, her grades were “quite poor”. But in high school, Ruth discovered that she excelled at sports, including basketball, softball, ice hockey, and even shot put. Sports gave her back her self-confidence and then even her grades improved. For the rest of her life she played sports and exercised everyday clear into her 90s.
She said she was a tomboy growing up. There was a field behind their house that the city would flood in the winter for a skating rink and then turn into a softball field in the summer. She loved to ice-skate. The Detroit river was a block and a half from her childhood home and they would swim in that filthy river in the summer. Her mom would tell them not to drink the water, and she attributes her lifelong good health to the immunities she built up while swimming there. She loved swimming and would still drive her golf cart, “The Canadian Flyer”, down the street to her grandson Michael and his wife Tara’s house to swim as often as she felt good enough.
After high school Ruth found a job at the Empire-Hanna Coal Company in Windsor, and it was there that she met Jean Morrison, who would soon become Jean Orme. Jean met Merrill Orme when he was a missionary for the LDS Church in Windsor. After his mission he came back to Windsor and got Jeanie. They were married in 1943, and moved to Biggs. In August 1944, Ruth went to visit them and stayed until October. It was then that she decided that she wanted to live in California someday. In 1948 she obtained her permanent residence papers to live in California. She left from Michigan Central Station in Detroit, and cried all the way across the United States, arriving in Biggs three days later. She made California home and later became a U.S. citizen in 1962. She always loved Canada, but was also proud of her U.S. citizenship.
She lived with Jeanie and Merrill for about a year and a half, and worked at Linn Lumber Co. in Gridley. She bought a bicycle from Montgomery Wards and rode it to work in good weather, but got Merrill to give her a ride when it rained. She loved that bike and it is still hanging up in the shop behind her house.
Ruth met Maurice William (Bill) Carlin on a blind date in August 1944, on her first trip to California—they went with Jeanie and Merrill to a dance at Robinson’s corner. They saw each other a few times after that, but nothing came of it because she went back to Windsor.
Their first date after she came to California to live permanently was in February 1949—Bill invited her to the Gold and Green Ball. Her friend Norma Fife made her a beautiful red velvet formal for the dance. They started “going pretty steady” after that. They were engaged in Sept. of 1949, and were married the 21st of October that same year, by Bishop W.C. Jensen, at Merrill’s parent’s home in Biggs. They lived in an apartment on Lincoln St., in Gridley for a year while building their own home at the south end of Losser Ave. They moved in in November 1950, before the interior was even completely finished, and lived there for the rest of their lives.
Ruth was baptized into the L.D.S. Church on Christmas day in 1949, by Grandpa. Her family had a hard time understanding her desire to join the church but always supported her and wanted her to be happy. She had a strong testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel her entire life. Ruth and Bill were sealed in the Mesa Arizona temple in February, 1954.
Ruth served faithfully wherever she was called, but her favorite calling was Relief Society secretary. She told me many times that if she could have her wish she would be Relief Society secretary for eternity.
Bill and Ruth had four daughters, Barbara Jean, Deborah Ruth, Margaret Sue, and Billie Joyce. She loved her daughters with everything she had. When my her granddaughter, Becca, interviewed her about her life the summer of 2016, she asked her to tell her about her girls and Ruth said, “I just thought they were so beautiful.” She woke them up each morning with fresh squeezed orange juice. She sewed them beautiful matching dresses and made homemade dinners every night. She is famous for her pies, sausage rolls, rice pudding, intensely green pickles, apricot jam, and an amazing Roast beef dinner every Sunday. She would stand at the end of the driveway and wave goodbye every time they drove away for as long as she could walk to the end of the driveway, or at least the sidewalk if it was raining. They could have done without the flyswatter spankings, although they must have deserved them when they got them.
Ruth continued to love sports through it all. When her daughters were teenagers Maggie remembered they were having a young women’s basketball tournament and only had 4 girls show up to play. They had to have 5, so the ref let Ruth play with them. Maggie remembers she couldn’t have been more proud that her mom could play better than all of the young women.
Ruth was a hard worker and worked side by side with Bill on the farm where they raised peaches, prunes, walnuts, pumpkins, and 4 tractor driving girls (some more reluctant drivers than others). She had beautiful flower gardens and loved the hummingbirds that would visit them.
Ruth always had music playing when she was working in the house, and taught many of her grandkids to dance barefoot in her kitchen listening to Perry Como and Glenn Miller.
Ruth’s relationship with Jeanie and Merrill and their children always remained a special part of her life. As their families grew they shared their lives and were friends that were more like family. 10 of Mom’s descendants so far have been named Ruth, after her, and 2 of the Ormes as well.
Ruth’s real love in life was people. She made you feel like an old friend from the moment you met her. She never forgot a birthday and spent hours of her life on her phone and computer keeping in touch with all of the people she loved all over the world.
She was an amazing listener, and loved people without judgement or agenda. Ruth said that growing up she had been very shy, and would marvel at the way her sister Barb could easily interact with people. As an adult she decided she wanted to be able to love people more freely and so consciously chose to open up to people more. Knowing her after tha, you would never guess that it had once been hard for her to approach people. She always made an effort to greet new people and make friends, and she made sure everyone knew that she loved them with a kind smile, a wink, and a hug every time she saw you. She always said that she thought she had no talents, but she had perfected the art of loving people and making them welcome.
And she was a lot of fun. Whether it was whistling dressed up as big bird at the relief society party, her fabulous accents, beating her grandsons at basketball at 80, game nights with friends, or her ability to laugh at herself, she made life joyful for the people around her. She became the surrogate mother or grandmother for many of her friends, and it was sometimes hard to tell who were friends and who was family.
As her daughters grew up and got married, Ruth’s family expanded. She deeply loved her son-in-laws, grandkids, and great-grandkids. Ruth’s house holds a special place in all of their hearts, full of memories of love and fun. She made family the priority of her life and taught her family to all love and cherish each other and their time together. When her grandson, David asked her what she would say she knew it was their final conversation, in true Ruthie form she replied, “Just keep being as wonderful as you are.” Then she added, “take care of your families,” and “live the gospel.” That is the heritage from Ruth.
And she documented it all with photographs and movies of every occasion.
Ruth passed away peacefully on Thanksgiving day, November 24, 2016. Her family and friends are keenly aware of the hole her passing leaves in our lives, but are grateful to know she is with Bill and Barb and her family that she missed so much.
We know we will see her again, and that this is not goodbye, but as Ruth would say,
“See you later, alligator.”
